Top 10 Lessons Learned from nearly 14 years as a Soccer Mom

Posted on 22. Feb, 2010 by kchristieh in life lessons, parenting, sports

When I registered my preschoolers for soccer in the Fall of 1996, I never imagined that I’d be a soccer mom until 2010. My soccer-viewing days ended last Friday when my daughter’s high school team lost in the first round of CIF playoffs. Our soccer experience was sometimes rewarding, and sometimes frustrating, but always an adventure.

Along the way, I learned or confirmed the following lessons:

1. Don’t become the frog in boiling water. If someone had told us how much club soccer would impact our family, we may not have chosen to do it. Instead, the warm water just got hotter and hotter.
2. Find your niche. I had no interest in being a referee, but I loved making AYSO team banners.
3. Even though it’s hard to make a banner of a hyena, whatever you design will be ok since no one’s sure what a hyena looks like. Use lots of fur. Best mascot ever.
4. Don’t question the refs. They’re trying hard, and they’re no more perfect than anyone else. Complaining won’t change the call, and it’ll just make things stressful.
5. Expect little, so you won’t be disappointed.
6. Get a chair with a built-in umbrella.
7. Kids don’t need snacks at the end of the game. But they like them as long as they’re not healthy.
8. Always carry a blanket, extra water and a first-aid kit in the car.
9. Bad coaches don’t get better.
10. Sports aren’t as enjoyable when winning becomes more important than having a good time.

My daughter says that she learned:

1. You should always work really hard, but
2. Hard work won’t always pay off, but
3. It’s worth it when you love the sport.
4. How to get along with all sorts of people.
5. How to deal with all sorts of coaches, which has helped her to adapt to different teachers, and some day, bosses.
6. How to be a team player.

Those are good lessons.

Would I do it over again? Only if the kids wanted to. They probably would.

Katrina Kenison to speak this Thursday at LCPC

Posted on 13. Feb, 2010 by kchristieh in books, parenting

When my kids were little, they didn’t understand why someone would cry if they weren’t hurt. They thought I was crazy for getting teary-eyed when we’d pass a wedding party outside of a church. I think they’re starting to understand, however, as we all broke down recently while watching Marley & Me. Some things just hit you harder, and as you grow older, there are more life experiences you can relate to.

That’s what Katrina Kenison does for me. When someone emailed me a link to a video of her reading from her most recent book, , I almost didn’t watch it. I didn’t want to sacrifice 7 minutes to watch a YouTube video. But I trusted the judgment of the person who sent it to me, so I finally clicked on the link. I’m so glad I did. It made me reflect upon the joys and challenges that have come with parenting, and how much my children and I have grown. It also reminded me of how much I’ve been blessed by being a mother for the past 18 years. Grab the tissues and check this out:

You can hear Katrina in person this Thursday, February 18th at La Canada Presbyterian Church. She’ll be speaking during my Parent Ed class, but it’s open to the public. The program starts at 12:30 pm, and she’ll sign books after the presentation. Please rsvp to . Babysitting is available for $10 per child. If you would like to have babysitting for your child, you MUST confirm a spot with Sandy at before Feb. 18th.

Here’s the official event flyer. I hope you can come!

My son of a gun

Posted on 01. Feb, 2010 by kchristieh in parenting

When my daughter was little, I bought her a dump truck. She used it to store blocks.

When my son came along, he loved that dump truck. He loved anything with wheels.

So on his first Christmas I bought him a doll. He seemed to like it, but he wouldn’t name it. It became “Baby Doll.” It was ignored. When he was old enough, he threw it into the pool and rescued it. I was encouraged; perhaps he was starting to bond with the doll. Alas, after several tosses, Baby Doll became a pool toy. She floated face down in the pool.

In the Toy Battle of Nature vs. Nurture, Nature won, doll down.

When my son got older, he wanted an airsoft gun. I held my ground until he was 15, when I allowed him to purchase an airsoft pistol. It has an orange tip, and shoots little plastic pellets that don’t penetrate the skin. He soon graduated to an airsoft rifle, which he would use in epic battles in the local hills. When his rifle broke, we went to the mecca of airsofting, the Evike store in San Gabriel. (see photo to the right)

I’ve never seen a store less targeted towards me; I’m less likely to buy something there than Cabella’s. Whether it’s the big Chinese lion statues, the Playboy centerfold autographs, or the endless supply of realistic-looking clothing and weaponry (with orange tips), I don’t ever expect to visit Evike without my son in tow or in mind.

However, when he tested his new rifle, I insisted on donning goggles and taking a few shots. I was pretty darn good, and humbly admit that it was fun. The young woman who helped us was bright and knowledgeable, and I got a kick out of the fact that she was wearing Hello Kitty shorts. I doubt that my knees are up for crawling through rattlesnake-ridden underbrush, or that the adolescent boys would appreciate me joining them, but I think I understand why they play with the airsoft guns. It’s exciting and active, and requires teamwork and strategy. They’re too old to play tag, so I should be glad they’re getting away from their video games and computers and doing something together.

As long as they don’t take it any further. I’m glad there’s not an Army Experience Center here. The one at the Franklin Mills Mall in Philadelphia boasts a video gaming arena, warefare simulators, a tactical operations center and more. There are Army recruiters ready to discuss enlisting with the young people that are eligible.

I’m not ready for that. I’m still hoping for something a little more nurturing for my guy.

Last field trip to Hyperion Treatment Plant

Posted on 06. Jan, 2010 by kchristieh in education, parenting, travel

Yesterday I chaperoned what will probably wind up being my last school field trip ever when I accompanied my daughter’s AP Environmental Science class to the Hyperion Treatment Plant near LAX. Thanks for inviting me, Dr. E!

We got to ride in yellow school buses without seat belts. I had fun sitting next to my friend Sharon S. We sat in front so we wouldn’t make the kids feel awkward. It was strange to be able to see so much in the rear view mirror.  Apparently, other chaperones must choose these seats, too. Of course, all the kids were quite well-behaved.

I knew we were in for some fun when this was the first sign I saw. Once the waste water is processed, the clean water is pumped 5 miles out in the ocean, 90′ below the surface, via a 12′ diameter pipe.

But first, we hung out on Dockweiler State Beach for an hour and a half while the first bus took the tour. Hey, 2006! I found your cellphone!

This plant treats 350 million gallons of wastewater from 3 million Los Angeles residents each day. That’s enough to fill up 3 or 4 Rose Bowls each day.

“Wastewater” refers to what comes from your house, not what goes down the drains in the street. That goes straight to the ocean, which is why it’s particularly important not to litter on the street.

Of course, many of us in La Canada have septic tanks, so our effluent never makes it to such a fancy treatment plant. Instead, it collects under our yards and kills our beautiful oak trees. Or mine, anyway.

Guess what’s in this truck? I hope it’s not dumping it near you.

These guys are the facility watchdogs. I think one of them is in the Witness Protection Program.

If you imagine some of the worst things that could wash down the toilet or the drain, they’ve probably been sifted here. I wouldn’t want to explain some of this to younger kids.

Our tourguide says that they’ve found motorcycle parts, money, bowling balls, and even body parts coming through. Eeek!

It smelled bad enough, so I’d hate to be around when the siren sounds.

Everything was really clean on the outside.

Water is being processed under these grids.

The architecture was impressive. The Hyperion plant was named as one of the most amazing public works projects of the 20th century.

Seagulls enjoyed feasting on the bacteria in the skimmer ponds.

Everything looked so sparkling clean. But when I see this, I still smell it…

Nancy, our tour guide, was fantastic. She was sharp, knowledgeable, and enthusiastic. Here, she’s showing how water leaves the ponds.

I didn’t take any pictures after this since we went to an underground area where photography wasn’t permitted. It reminded me of Jack Bauer’s haunts at CTU. Many movies and tv shows have been filmed at Hyperion, including Spiderman.

Nancy says that Hyperion is featured in the tourism book . You might be able to take a tour if you call ahead.

The best part of the day occurred before my daughter went to bed, when she thanked me for going on the trip. Awww!! I’m so grateful that my mere presence there didn’t embarrass her. Too bad this is our last field trip together.  :(

‘The Big Lebowski’ Syndrome

Posted on 30. Dec, 2009 by kchristieh in parenting

At lunch yesterday, a friend and I discussed how to keep our sons focused and motivated. I told her that many of our fears could be summed up in three words: ‘The Big Lebowski.’ This 1998 Coen brothers movie starred Jeff Bridges as Jeff Lebowski, aka The Dude, an unemployed Los Angeleno who gives new depth to the term “slacker.”

My timing was perfect, for today’s NY Times notes in “Dissertations on His Dudeness” that,

“The Big Lebowski” has spawned its own shaggy, fervid world: drinking games, Halloween costumes, bumper stickers (“This aggression will not stand, man”) and a drunken annual festival that took root in Louisville, Ky., and has spread to other cities. The movie is also the subject of an expanding shelf of books, including “The Dude Abides: The Gospel According to the Coen Brothers” and the forthcoming “The Tao of the Dude.”

Where cult films go, academics will follow. New in bookstores, and already in its second printing, is “The Year’s Work in Lebowski Studies,” an essay collection edited by Edward P. Comentale and Aaron Jaffe (Indiana University Press, $24.95).

If academics are taking it seriously, perhaps we should, too.

My friend had never seen the movie, so I advised that she watch it with her children by her side and see what discussion it prompts. The danger, of course, is that a viewer could choose to emulate The Dude. At least I consider that to be a danger. Maybe I’m too uptight. Maybe I’m paranoid because I live in L.A. But this is not my vision for my children.

Lessons I never thought I’d need to teach my teens

Posted on 16. Dec, 2009 by kchristieh in life lessons, parenting

When I became a parent, I knew we’d have talks about s*x, drugs, working hard, etc. But here are a few things I’ve felt compelled to teach my teens that I never expected we’d discuss, or discuss so soon. Most have come up either because of stories we’ve heard, movies we’ve seen or articles I’ve read. I’ve repeated each of the following many times to my kids, and hope that they don’t have to experience these situations to realize the wisdom of my words.

Parties & Drinking:

• If someone passes out at a party, they’re asleep if you can rouse them and they can talk, but they’re unconscious if they can’t talk.
  • If they’re asleep, summon an adult and keep making sure you can wake them and that they’re sleeping on their side in case they throw up.
  • If they’re unconscious, call 911. (or this might happen)
• Don’t attend parties that don’t have adult supervision.
• If you’re at a party and your intuition is telling you that things are going downhill, get out fast.
• Always respectfully do what a police officer or Sheriff’s deputy asks.

Drugs:

• Marijuana can be laced with more deadly drugs.
• You can become addicted to meth the first time you use it. So don’t.

S*x:

• Besides potential pregnancy and emotional and reputation fallout, a big reason to avoid s*x outside of marriage is STDs.
• Condoms don’t always work, and oral contraceptives won’t prevent STDs.

Technology:

• Don’t let any pictures be taken of yourself that you’d be ashamed of showing up in public.
• Don’t join a Facebook group or friend someone just because all your friends have.
• Don’t let kids you don’t completely trust handle your cellphone.

Media:

• Can you imagine discussing Viagra or Monica Lewinsky with an elementary schooler? If your kids watch tv, you’ll have discussions about topics such as these. Just wait until you’re sitting on the couch next to them when a love scene in a movie comes on. Awkward!

P**n: (note: using ** so I don’t get banned by search engines)

• Even one look at p**n can embed an image you’ll always remember, so don’t look at it.
• Figure out what you’ll say if you’re at someone’s house and they start looking at or watching p**n.
• Today’s p**n is often much skankier than the stuff that was in magazines many years ago since pictures and videos don’t usually pass through editors before they’re posted on the internet.

Driving:

• Always look up Angeles Crest Highway before you turn onto it or cross it.
• If you don’t come to such a complete stop that the body of the car doesn’t back up a little bit, the local Sheriff’s deputies may give you a ticket. Better to do it and avoid traffic school.
• It doesn’t matter if “everyone else” is driving other kids before their first year of California driving is up: it’s illegal, there’s a good reason it’s illegal, and you’ll lose many privileges if you either drive someone else when you’re too young or you drive with someone else who isn’t old enough to drive you.
• Don’t let anyone into your car whom you think might have drugs on them, since they could leave the drugs in your car and you could get into trouble.
• Motorcycles are dangerous. Even if you are the safest driver with the safest bike, you’ve only got two wheels and can skid out if someone else cuts you off. Then, you’re completely vulnerable.

Weapons:

• If a kid shows you a gun and you’re not under competent adult supervision, get away as quickly as possible and tell an adult.
• If someone even jokes about shooting someone, take it seriously and report it.

Emotions:

• Any time someone talks about suicide, take it seriously.
• If someone breaks up with you, then they don’t value you enough, so you shouldn’t pine over them. (That’s a tough one.)

Forgiveness:

• Gossip hurts.
• It’s better if you come to me and let me know you messed up than for me to find out later or for the mess to get bigger.
• “Sorry” means you’re never going to do it again.
• Don’t follow “sorry” with “But.”
• Forgive others just as you wish to be forgiven.

I’m sure I’m missing some, and I welcome your suggestions.

My new role model: Leigh Ann Tuohy

Posted on 28. Nov, 2009 by kchristieh in inspirational people, movies, parenting

I was slightly hesitant to see “The Blind Side” movie with my family. I felt like I already knew the story after having read the 2006 Michael Lewis article, “The Ballad of Big Mike,” in the NY Times Magazine years ago and seeing numerous previews for the movie.

I’m so glad I went. I only knew the framework of the story, but the beauty of it was in the details.

The framework is this: a rich family takes in a homeless African-American teen who has been given the chance to play football at their children’s private school if he gets his grades up. They help him get his act together, and he becomes a football success in high school and college, and has now moved on to the NFL.

I knew that much of the story was driven by the strong, determined mother in the family that takes him in, but I had no idea what a role model she was. Leigh Ann Tuohy’s two dominant characteristics are ones I strive to have: she cares deeply about others, and she’s true to herself. She takes in Michael Oher because she wants to give him a chance to have a decent life after all the struggles he’s had, and she does it despite the racist remarks of some of her fellow Southerners. I also admire her confidence and outspokenness. It takes a special personality to get away with stopping a high school football practice by marching out onto the field and telling the players what to do. I’m too polite, and would never do that. I wouldn’t recommend it to anyone, actually, but I’m impressed that she knew when it was the right thing to do and succeeded because she already had the respect of the coaches and players and said exactly what needed to be said. Sandra Bullock played Leigh Ann Tuohy beautifully, and showed that despite all her strength, she was also a sensitive person who would retreat to a bedroom or the car when she had to cry.

Of course, I also deeply admire Michael Oher, who survived his difficult childhood by “closing his eyes” when pain and evil swirled around him. Leigh Ann describes him lovingly as “Ferdinand the Bull,” and she’s right. His big body may scare some, but he’s got a big, soft heart within.

It’s too bad that smaller kids in his old neighborhood don’t get the same chance that he did.

Pledge to keep kids safe: join SafeHomes on Facebook

Posted on 24. Nov, 2009 by kchristieh in parenting, social networking

For years, the Community Prevention Council of La Canada Flintridge has been encouraging area parents to take the following pledge:

“I will not allow minors to consume beer, wine, alcohol, or use illegal drugs in my home or on my property. I will not allow parties or gatherings in my home without proper adult supervision.”

Parents who are willing to agree to that have long been asked to join SafeHomes, an online, password-protected database that allows parents to see which other parents have agreed to the pledge, and therefore to know which homes are more likely to host safe parties and events.

This evening, Community Prevention Council chair Will Moffitt created a . People who join the group agree to abide by the pledge. For those of us who visit Facebook daily, it’ll be much easier to access than the password-protected database, and it’ll make it easy to get in touch with fellow group members.

I hope you’ll join. The more people that join, the more valuable a resource this will be.

Lessons aren’t learned after Orinda teen dies

Posted on 23. Nov, 2009 by kchristieh in parenting

Did you know that if there’s underage drinking at your house, you’re liable even if you don’t know about it or aren’t home? And that if the kids paid to attend the party, you’re in even more trouble?

Those were some of the points brought up by Will Moffitt at our September PTSA meeting, and those points are driven home in the lead article in today’s LA Times article, “A teen party, a mysterious death — and a town’s unanswered grief,” about a teen boy in Orinda who died after drinking beer at a party he paid to attend at a home where the parents weren’t present. It’s a very sad story, and could easily happen in our fair city. My heart goes out to everyone involved.

Two points in the article particularly struck me. The first was this paragraph:

Giving underage drinkers immunity from prosecution for calling 911 might encourage them to summon help, Klingman said. Many colleges and at least two states, Colorado and New Jersey, provide immunity as a way to prevent alcohol-related deaths.

I LOVE this idea. Kids see all sorts of dangerous things, but are often afraid to tell because they don’t want to get in trouble or be branded as “tattletales.” Take away the disincentives. If something dangerous is happening, they shouldn’t be afraid to seek help.

The second was this statement by the Orinda Chief of Police:

“Apparently someone dying at a party has not affected their partying,” he said. But he added that some teens do go to parties and abstain. The answer may lie in finding out why, he said.

It’s sad that this hasn’t affected teen partying practices. If it had, at least some good would have come of this tragedy, much like it did when Crescenta Valley high school formed its Prom Plus event after one of their students was shot.

I was particularly intrigued by the second part of his statement, where he thinks the answer to changing the partying culture may be found by figuring out why some teens who attend parties choose to abstain. It’s like studying someone with the HIV virus who doesn’t get AIDS: find out what makes them immune to it, and see if you can replicate it in others.

Has anyone ever tried this? Lately? Here?

The best Red Ribbon Week posters

Posted on 18. Nov, 2009 by kchristieh in education, life lessons, parenting

One of my goals this year as PTSA President is to make Red Ribbon Week more meaningful. It’s tough to communicate an anti-drug, anti-drinking message to cynical high school kids, especially when so many of them have already experimented with these substances.

Anne Tryba saved the day. She volunteered to be the Red Ribbon Week Chair about a month before it took place, and not only managed to stage an essay contest that garnered nearly 200 entries, but she created the following four posters. These aren’t of the mere “Just say no” variety. I think they’re very effective at shocking kids to take a second look at the consequences of their decisions.

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“Call of Duty: Modern Warfare 2″ invades our home

Posted on 11. Nov, 2009 by kchristieh in parenting, politics, videos

Yesterday I braved the line at Gamestop to pick up the copy of “Call of Duty: Modern Warfare 2″ that I’d reserved for my son. I’m not completely comfortable with this purchase: it’s rated “M” and is completely violent. But the graphics are amazing, and at 16, my son’s not much younger than many of our real-life soldiers. Besides, he has a broken leg and all his friends got the game too, so he’d wind up playing anyway.

Here’s the trailer for Modern Warfare 2 to give you an idea of how amazing this game is. It’s eerily realistic. The most disturbing scenes I’ve witnessed so far involve battles inside the White House and in a leafy suburb called “Arcadia.” It reminds me a lot of “24.”

I’m not the only one who’s uncomfortable with this game: The Week has a summary of views that question the timing of the release and a few scenes in the game. After all the hype, it would have been difficult to change the release date, and there probably wouldn’t have ever been a perfect date. As for the airport scene the article mentions, my son says the game warns players that it’s disturbing and gives them a few chances to skip it.

I used to think that violent video games would have more of an effect on a person’s propensity for violence, but I definitely don’t see that happening with my son. I don’t think he’s violent at all, and my biggest concern with him playing this is that he could be doing other more productive things, like reading SAT study guides or classic works of literature.

I wonder if Modern Warfare 2 will encourage anyone to sign up for the military? If so, they might want to take a look at The Onion’s preview of Modern Warfare 3. It portrays a different side of military life, where soldiers repair trucks and fight boredom, depression, and poor cell phone signals, and anxiously await care packages from home.

War stinks for everyone. I’m so grateful for the men and women who have served our country, and dream of a day when they can all come home safely.

What I learned when my son broke his leg

Posted on 06. Nov, 2009 by kchristieh in health, life lessons, my life, parenting, social networking, sports

It’s been tough to keep up with my goal of daily blog posting lately. Clients, volunteer positions, and a child applying to college have taken a higher priority. As if that wasn’t enough, this past Friday night my son fractured his tibia and dislocated his kneecap in a high school football game. He had surgery the next day, and we spent two nights in the hospital. Since then, I’ve been his personal nurse, helping him move his whole-leg cast when he gets up or down from a sitting or sleeping position, refilling his water bottle, and making him caprese sandwiches.

Here are some of the lessons I’ve learned this week:

• Every hospital patient needs an advocate. My son entered the emergency room in utter pain, and after 10 minutes of waiting we were told it would be another 20 minutes before a triage nurse would see him. It was only when I whipped out my purse supply of Tylenol and with tears in my eyes asked how much to give him that they finally talked to him. Likewise, after his surgery, the nurses who attended to him were very kind, but needed reminding that 40 minutes before they’d promised more pain medication or help with something important. I’m glad I was there for him.
• Keep your situation in perspective. I felt and feel awful for my son, but his situation could be far worse. I said lots of prayers for people in the hospital that were in worse shape than my son.
• You can’t wash your hands too much. I treated every surface in that hospital as if it was coated with the plague. Time will tell if I was successful in avoiding illness, but I’m glad I was careful.
• Hospital food can be good. The food at our hospital cafeteria was excellent and cheap. I should eat lunch there with friends. Except for my previous point about hospital germs.
• When you need to go rescue your child who’s broken a bone, if possible, take an extra two minutes and bring: magazines, water bottles, a phone charger, a jacket, and socks. You’ll be so glad you did when you’re at the hospital overnight or for hours on end. (This was my son’s 4th bone break, so I learned this awhile ago.)
• Guard your time at the hospital and afterwards. It was good that everyone didn’t visit the hospital, since each visit was both exhilarating and tiring, and at one point I told some people that instead of talking on the phone and bothering my son, that it would be better to text. I also made sure to turn both our phones off at night.
• You never know when your child will play his last game. I didn’t attend Friday night’s game; my daughter had come home sick that afternoon, so I chose to stay home with her. My husband and I actually looked at each other and said, “There’s no way he’ll get hurt, right? He’s the kicker.” Hahaha. In retrospect, it’s just as well I wasn’t there, as it would have been torture to watch him lie on the field for so long with no power to do anything. But after 12 years of organized sports, this may wind up being the last game he plays in until he plays intramurals in college.
• Aerobeds are amazing. I’m sleeping on one next to my son’s bed in case he needs to get up in the middle of the night or needs more pain medication. I’m sleeping like a log on that thing. Note: this is just true for the actual Aerobed brand. I haven’t been so happy with other air mattresses.
• I can mention this one since my son won’t read this: if your child is asleep next to you and it’s dark and you’re bored, copy cell phone numbers of their closest friends onto your cell phone. You never know when you’ll need them.
• Don’t be afraid to ask for help. When I posted on Facebook that I was looking for a bed tray my son could use to eat his meals and do homework, two showed up on my doorstep the next morning. Ditto for needing some concrete blocks to keep the dog in. One of my Facebook friends was going to the hardware store anyway, so she saved me a trip that would take me away from my son. And the food people have brought us has saved many nights of frozen pizza. And my son appreciates the cards and gifts people have brought.
• I live in a great community. People care, and back it up with action. I’m very, very, very fortunate to live here and have such wonderful friends.  :)

When “music festival” really means “rave.” Plus, how I lost respect for the San Manuel Indian Nation.

Posted on 20. Oct, 2009 by kchristieh in health, music, parenting, startling statistics

The Sheriff’s Deputy that spoke at last Friday’s Red Ribbon Week PTSA meeting spoke fast, since he had lots of ground to cover. We learned the effects of various drugs on the body, we heard which ones are abused the most in our community, and we saw examples of how students hide drugs at school

One of the most fascinating things I learned was that “music festival” is often a euphemism for “rave.” The Deputy said that when kids say they’re going to a music festival, it usually means they’re going to a rave. He described raves as having loud music, flashing lights, casual sex and lots of drugs. (Here’s the Urban Dictionary definition of a rave.) He said they’re often held in convention centers, warehouses or the desert, and any security that’s there can either be bought off so they ignore the drugs or is just concerned about weapons, not drugs.

Here’s an example of a “music festival” this weekend: 2009 Cypress Hill Smokeout Festival. It’s being held at the San Manuel Amphitheater in San Bernardino, which is named for the San Manuel Indian Nation. The San Manuel Indian Bingo & Casino is also a sponsor of SmokeOut, as are LA Weekly, MySpace and Jack in the Box. In case you have doubts that SmokeOut isn’t purely a music festival, here’s a screenshot of the homepage:

And don’t miss Saturday’s expert session: “For musicians, marijuana has long proved to be a source of creative inspiration. For listeners, music and marijuana is the perfect stoner cocktail. Smoke a joint, blunt or bong, and kick back and enjoy your favorite tunes.”

The Deputy also informed us that much of the marijuana consumed locally comes from legal medical dispensaries. He said that kids will go and tell a doctor (or should I put that in quotes?) that they have a headache or some other pain, and will be prescribed marijuana for it. They’ll then re-sell the marijuana at the school for a profit. If you’re not sure how this works, perhaps you can learn at the Medical Marijuana Expo at SmokeOut. Don’t worry about having difficulty finding a medical marijuana dispensary: this past Sunday’s NY Times article, “Los Angeles Prepares for Clash over Marijuana“, says that, “There are more marijuana stores here than public schools. Signs emblazoned with cannabis plants or green crosses sit next to dry cleaners, gas stations and restaurants.” For the record, I voted for legalizing marijuana for medical purposes here in California. I never imagined that it would be this unregulated, however, and that it could wind up in the hands of children.

Hopefully parents will understand what this really is before they let their kids attend. And if they do attend, hopefully they won’t drive while they’re high.

My Life is Average

Posted on 14. Sep, 2009 by kchristieh in parenting, quotes

Back in March, I blogged about FML. It’s a strangely effective way to feel better about your life, but I’ve decided that My Life is Average (MLIA) is much more uplifting. I learned about it from my kids, who like to share MLIA posts on Facebook walls. Here are a few of my current favorites:

• Today, I was talking with my mom, and she told me that when she was young, one of the reasons she wanted to come to the U.S. was because she wanted to see squirrels. if she hadn’t come to the US, she wouldn’t have married my dad. I owe my existence to Squirrels. MLIA
• Today I found out that what I assumed was a birthmark on my uncle’s head is actually a tiny tattoo of a stick man mowing his receding hairline. The artist thought it was so cool he did it for free, I love my uncle. MLIA
• For spirit week, one day was pajama day. All the girls wore something sexy and almost inappropriate, I wore my dinosaur pajamas. Guess who got more attention? Winner. MLIA.
• Today, I was talking with my friend. She was talking about how weird it would be to have pants with only one foot hole. We then realized that would be a skirt. MLIA
• Today, my roommate, who wants to be a lawyer, made me sign a contract that I would clean up more. I scribbled in a random place, ‘Not valid on days ending in y.’ Now I can tell him to read the fine print when I don’t clean up. MLIA
• Today in my dorm room the doorbell rang. Sitting outside the door was a box labeled “A present from your friends in room 201″. I opened it and a guy popped out, gave me a high five and ran off down the hallway. MLIA.
• Today, I received an email telling me that a package was waiting for me in my dorm’s common area. I picked it up, hoping that my mom sent me money. She sent me a bubble gum machine. She rocks. MLIA

I like My Life Is Average because it reminds me to appreciate the every day pleasures of life. It also gives me insights into what makes kids happy. I like the bubblegum machine idea.  ;)

Hahaha!! After I wrote this post, I saw this on MyLifeIsAverage:

• Today, we had to pick the website we visited the most for class and present it. The girl before me picked FML. No one laughed. I showed MLIA. Everyone laughed. I found some new recruiters. You’re welcome. MLIA

Perfect!

Why is Smirnoff targeting Facebook ads at 17-year-olds?

Posted on 02. Sep, 2009 by kchristieh in advertising, health, parenting, social networking, things that bug me

I was shocked yesterday when I passed by my 17-year-old daughter as she cruised Facebook and saw that she’d been targeted with the Smirnoff ad to the right. Facebook allows advertisers to target ads by age, location and many other variables, so why was it marketing liquor to someone under 21? As Facebook’s own state,

7. Inappropriate Targeting

Ads need to be targeted relevantly and appropriately. For example, a dating ad should be targeted to users over 18 who are listed as single.

The ad also showed up on my page, right below an ad to take courses at Biola. I think Smirnoff missed the boat on this one, and Facebook was asleep at the wheel. Or maybe they weren’t, and were just trying to make a buck. I complained, and hopefully they’ll be more prudent in the future. In the meantime, parents should unfortunately expect that ads such as this may show up on their kids’ pages, and should discuss with them why they’re inappropriate.

Do they actually think that a picture of a kid rudely sucking his spaghetti shows respect toward children unfortunate enough to have Type 2 diabetes? It’s hard enough to have that disease without having to deal with the stereotypes that this ad reinforces. I doubt they’ll get many clicks on this one.

Teach your teens about EANABs

Posted on 22. Aug, 2009 by kchristieh in food, parenting

One of the first things I learned in RA training at Stanford in the mid-80’s was to provide EANABs (Equally Attractive Non-Alcoholic Beverages) at parties. This didn’t mean water or cheap soda: the non-alcoholic drinks needed to be just as enticing as the alcoholic ones. The goal was to make people who didn’t drink alcohol feel welcome, and to give people who did drink alcohol something to supplement it so they didn’t have too much. I didn’t realize that “EANAB” was primarily a Stanford acronym until I just did a Google search and most references involved Stanford. Maybe that’s why I felt so comfortable there.

I was reminded of EANABs this afternoon when my daughter hauled a 12-pack of Diet Coke to the shopping cart and declared that she wanted to bring some EANABs to a party this evening. I was impressed that she’d remembered what I’d taught her, and told her that any time she wanted to purchase EANABs, even through college, I’d be happy to pay.

Hopefully kids are making wise decisions this evening. Teens are scary sometimes.  :(

Top 10 Tips for the Perfect College Tour, plus Tips for the Tourguides

Posted on 20. Aug, 2009 by kchristieh in education, parenting

As the mother of a junior and a senior in high school, I’ve toured many colleges in the past year, and we’re not done yet. If you’re about to embark on this chapter of life, here are my top 10 tips for making the most of your college visit:

1. Try to tour a school before you apply, so the school can see that you’re serious about them.
2. If possible, set up an interview with an admissions counselor, a coach or someone in the department you’re interested in.
3. Ask questions such as:
   • How many students are in the average class? (NOTE: This is different from the faculty:student ratio, which often includes faculty who do research and don’t teach.)
   • Do TA’s teach classes?
   • What percentage of students live on campus? How many years is housing guaranteed for?
   • How would you describe the students here?
   • What’s your least favorite thing about this school?
   • What percentage of students go on to graduate school, and what ones do they attend?
   • What are the most popular majors on campus?
   • What do students do on weekends?
   • Are there fraternities and sororities on campus?
   • Ask the tour guide why he or she chose to attend that college, and what their other choices were.
   • How many students study overseas? Is it through the school or an outside program? (This can affect how many of your classmates will be overseas with you, and financial aid may not apply if it’s an outside program.)
4. When you see other students on campus, ask them what they think of the school. We’ve found it easiest to ask questions of students working at the student store or in the dining hall.
5. Stay close to the tour guide so you can hear what he or she says.
6. Bring a resume that details your GPA, test scores, advanced classes taken, sports and other activities. Give it to either your interviewer or the person you sign in for the tour with.
7. Take lots of pictures. Post them to Facebook and see how many people know about this school and what they think of it.
8. Have the student write down impressions of the visit right afterwards, so they can remember details when they’re making a decision.
9. If possible, visit while classes are in session so you can get a feel for what the students who attend are like.
10. If you get in and you’re seriously considering it, spend a night with a current student and attend the prospective freshman orientation.

After touring two schools on Tuesday, my kids and I realized we were becoming quite the connoisseurs of fine tour guides, and I promised to blog about it soon. Coincidentally, in yesterday’s NY Times article, Colleges Seek to Remake the Campus Tour, I learned that some schools are re-vamping their tours, often with the advice of an outside consultant. The article mentions two main recommendations: concentrate on anecdotes instead of statistics, and don’t walk backwards.

I’d beg to differ. If I were advising college admissions offices on how they should structure their tours, I’d advise them as follows:

• If you have more than four people on the tour, walk backwards. We went on one tour that had about 10 people, and we had a hard time hearing what the guide was saying since she never turned around.
• If possible, don’t have more than 15 people on a tour. If there are more, the people in the back will have a hard time staying engaged.
• Ask the names, hometowns and potential majors and interests of prospective students at the beginning of the tour. If no one wants to be an engineer, don’t waste our time touring the engineering building.
• Show us the inside of a dorm room. We don’t care if no one lives there at the moment. A student will spend more time there than anywhere else on campus, and we want to see what a typical room looks like.
• Know your statistics. We may not remember all of them, but some of them stick, and can be deal breakers or deal makers. In particular, we want to know what percentage of students live on campus.
• Don’t choose a tour guide just because he or she works in the admissions office. Choose guides that are personable and excited about the school.
• Choose guides that are articulate. We went on one tour where the guide was enthusiastic, but had horrible grammar. I left with the impression that the kids at this school might not be too bright.
• Keep us on well-traveled roads and paths. One tour guide brought us behind all the buildings, and had us enter the dining commons from the delivery entrance, passing by the dumpsters.
• Show us the insides of buildings, including classrooms. We’re not here for an architectural tour; we want to see where students spend their time and hear about those places.
• Don’t try to joke too much. The tour guide probably isn’t a comedian, and too many jokes seemed forced and often fall flat.
• Don’t only let the creme de la creme of your university show us around. We went on a tour of a public university that had four tour guides, and all of them were in the school’s highly selective honors program. I didn’t feel like I got to hear from an “average” student there.
• Give us a meal pass. Let us experience the school as much as possible by eating the food and hanging out in the student areas.
• Give us a coupon for the bookstore. If we buy a sweatshirt, that’ll be great publicity for you.

The perils and possibilities of the empty nest

Posted on 06. Jul, 2009 by kchristieh in animals, my life, parenting

Thank goodness my dog bolted to the yard yesterday morning, because he passed right over a baby bird that hadn’t survived long enough to even grow feathers. Later in the day, my husband said he found a dead baby bird, too. It was a bad day for birds to leave the nest.

But it was a good day for teenagers to leave the nest. Yesterday my husband and I both put “…have an empty nest” as our Facebook status without knowing the other had. Our daughter left for a month of living with a family and studying Spanish in Central America, and we dropped off our son at a techie camp at a local university. Early reports indicate that both are growing, thriving, and enjoying spreading their wings.

Parenting is a long, slow road, but every once in awhile you need to take a leap up to the next plateau. I feel like we did that this weekend, and so far so good…

Should I impose my parents’ rules on my children?

Posted on 27. Jun, 2009 by kchristieh in my life, parenting

When my sister and I were in late elementary school, my parents typed up a list of rules and posted it on the refrigerator. Here they are:

My parents were stricter than most, but we usually didn’t mind since we were very obedient. My mom is visiting me this weekend, and she remarked this afternoon that she realizes how lucky she was to have such easy kids.

Here are a few of my favorite rules:

• Get to go to bed 7.5 minutes later each birthday.
• No singing at the table.
• Don’t touch the dog until you’re done setting the table.
• We alternated months for keeping the backyard clean.
• Bathe whenever dirty or 2x a week.

I’ve actually got a list of rules for my kids, but I won’t embarrass them by posting them here. I’ve found that it’s easier to get kids to follow rules or get housework done if it’s written down and you don’t have to bug them.

Unless, of course, the rules get lost. I need to print out our rules again so I can have a less stressful summer!

When it’s best to H.A.L.T.

Posted on 26. Jun, 2009 by kchristieh in my life, parenting

When I was a manufacturing systems consultant, I overdosed on acronyms. From JIT to MRP, I often suspected they were used to impress the clients. As a result, these days I’m hesitant to use acronyms.

Here’s one that impressed me enough that I told my kids about it: H.A.L.T. It stands for

• Hungry
• Angry
• Lonely
• Tired

It’s what stops you from having healthy interactions with other people. If you’re any of those things, you should take a step back and try to solve the deficiency before you try to communicate with others. If you don’t, you may regret what you say or do. I learned it at Mark Hastings‘ talk at Growing Families at La Canada Presbyterian Church this past Sunday.

I’ve found this to be true with myself and with others I care about. I’m almost never angry or lonely, but I don’t function well if I’m hungry or tired. I’m trying to teach my kids to recognize these signs before they leave for college. The tough part is realizing that you’re having a problem when you’re in the midst of it.

I’m sure I’ll remember this acronym. Hopefully it’ll help me apply it. It’s usually pretty easy to fix being hungry (lucky American that I am) but sleep is sometimes a challenge.

It’s no wonder I don’t Twitter

Posted on 19. Jun, 2009 by kchristieh in parenting, social networking

I don’t even like getting Facebook updates on my cell phone. I just turned them off. I was only getting text messages when my husband updated his status or when someone commented on my status, but it was getting annoying checking my cell phone only to find a silly little comment. I used to get updates of my kids’ status updates, but they asked me to turn them off since it was freaky that they’d be sitting on the couch on Facebook and my phone would start speaking the text of their update.

I’ll save my phone for more important messages.

Advice for a parent buying their child’s first cell phone

Posted on 17. Jun, 2009 by kchristieh in parenting

Break out the tissues: my niece is the only kid in her 5th grade class not to have a cell phone. How ever does she survive?

As the mother of avid teen cell phone users, here’s my advice to my sister before she lets her daughter get a cell phone.

Paying for it:

• Sign up for an unlimited texting plan, either now or soon. It’ll save  money in the end.
• Her daughter should pay for her portion of the cell phone bill, especially downloaded games or ringtones. (Note: In our household, we make the kids pay the $9.99 for the extra line, but not for their percentage of the base bill. And we remind them of that constantly.)
• If the phone is lost or broken, her daughter will pay for a replacement. She will also pay if the phone is stolen because she isn’t careful.

Rules:

• The phone can’t be in the bedroom when she’s asleep.
• If you don’t mind tracking it, limit how much time may be spent on the phone each day. (good luck with that!)
• No phone at dinner.
• No texting or talking on the phone while in the car with parents unless she gets permission first.
• No phone while doing homework. (Note: That’s tough to enforce as the kids get older and talk about homework over the phone.)
• All phone numbers programmed into the phone must have a name.
• Don’t answer calls from people you don’t know.
• Set rules about whether games can be downloaded. Watch out for recurring monthly fees.
• Set rules about whether she may have access to the internet on the cell phone. I’d advise against it at a young age.
• The parents can examine the phone at any time and search through messages, pictures, call logs, etc.
• Obviously, all school rules must be followed. In our school, that means phones must be turned off during class. Check to see what her school’s policy is.

Talk to her about:

• Don’t text anything you wouldn’t say in public, since it can be forwarded.
• Don’t send any pictures you wouldn’t want on a billboard, since they can be forwarded and uploaded to the internet.
• Text messages can be misinterpreted. If it’s complicated or involves emotions, either call or talk to the person face-to-face.
• NEVER break up with a person via text message. It’s cowardly and rude.

Having a cell phone, especially at a young age, is a privilege, not a right. It’s a very useful tool for both the kid and the parents, but it must be used safely and wisely. Emphasize to the child that these rules are meant to keep them safe and to allow them the time to get homework done, do sports and play with friends.

My kids are so accustomed to cell phones that I wonder if they could survive without them. My daughter might have to this summer when she studies abroad. That may be the biggest learning experience of all!

The making of an Eagle Scout

Posted on 15. Jun, 2009 by kchristieh in inspirational people, my life, parenting

I was honored this evening to serve on the review panel for a local boy who was trying to get his Eagle Scout award. He had clearly worked quite hard for this, and taken the Boy Scout lessons to heart. He had glowing letters of recommendation praising his leadership abilities, enthusiasm, and diligence, and he and his parents were very articulate in explaining how much he’d learned and how much this meant to him. It was one of the most pleasurable committees I’ll probably ever serve on: it took about 1 millisecond for us to come to the unanimous conclusion that this boy clearly deserved to become an Eagle Scout.

I wish that my son had continued on in scouting past elementary school, but alas, club soccer won out. It’s not as if we have a strong family history of scouting: my husband didn’t continue on in scouting, and my father chose to go the DeMolay path instead of complete the few things he needed to do to become an Eagle Scout. I was actually a Boy Scout Computer Explorer Scout, and enjoyed playing on the computers at Bell Labs in high school, but we never had uniforms or oaths. Neither my daughter nor I continued with Girl Scouts past elementary school.

What is it that makes a kid stick with scouting? From what I heard tonight, and what my own family’s experience is, I’d say it depends upon:

• The quality of the leader
• Whether the child enjoys being with the other troop members
• Family tradition
• Competing demands
• Love of scouting

My father regrets not becoming an Eagle Scout. He says that when you’re an adult, there are very few accomplishments you can proudly note that you achieved in high school. One of them is becoming an Eagle Scout.

Even though he wasn’t an Eagle Scout, my dad’s a great guy anyway, as are the other guys in my life.

Meet the competition: SAT Review Gone Wild

Posted on 12. Jun, 2009 by kchristieh in education, parenting

I’m not sure which part of the following Elite of Arcadia SAT review course ad scares my children more. Is it the special “2400 Club” class for kids who have already scored above 2200 and are seeking a perfect score? Or is it the Monday – Friday, 14 week, 5.5 hour/day Boot Camp?

When you’re in a district that’s ranked highly by Newsweek, you compete against kids who take these classes. One child I know said these classes should be called “mental hospitals,” since this child swears that many of the kids who take them are on a verge of a breakdown. Perhaps they are. And perhaps they and/or their parents think it’s worth it.

The Wall St. Journal recently featured an article titled, “SAT Coaching Found to Boost Scores — Barely.” It said that,

Families can spend thousands of dollars on coaching to help college-bound students boost their SAT scores. But a new report finds that these test-preparation courses aren’t as beneficial as consumers are led to believe.

The report, to be released Wednesday by the National Association for College Admission Counseling, criticizes common test-prep-industry marketing practices, including promises of big score gains with no hard data to back up such claims. The report also finds fault with the frequent use of mock SAT tests because they can be devised to inflate score gains when students take the actual SAT.

On the other hand, the article continued that,

The report also noted that some college-admissions officers indirectly encourage applicants to sign up for SAT-prep courses by setting score cutoffs. A survey included in the report found that more than a third of schools with tight selection criteria said that an increase of just 20 points in the math section of the SAT, and of 10 points in the critical reading section, would “significantly improve students’ likelihood of admission.”

Either way, my kids won’t be taking these classes. My daughter took her last SAT on Saturday, and my son would rue me forever if I made him take this class. Hopefully they’ll gain good life, spiritual, athletic and academic experiences from the summer we have plannned.

How to survive sending your child to college

Posted on 14. May, 2009 by kchristieh in education, parenting

I have two high schoolers – a sophomore and a junior – so I truly appreciated today’s college panel at Parent Ed. Our instructor moderated a panel of five mothers of college students, and asked them questions about what to expect when your kid leaves for college.

Here are a few things they said:

• Your family will change once your child leaves for college. It may get quieter or crazier once they leave, depending upon who’s still home, but it’s likely to be different. Also, don’t assume you’ll spend the whole time pining for Junior: several moms said they’ve enjoyed getting to spend more time with their husbands and appreciate the freedom they have to go on vacations and out to dinner whenever they wish.
• The actual first dropoff at school can be difficult. The mother of a Westmont student said that Westmont has a tradition where new freshmen walk up the hill as bagpipers play “Amazing Grace” and people cheer, and then when they graduate they do the same but walking down the hill. She said she would have lost it if she hadn’t seen another kid’s parents totally blubbering. I can barely hear “Amazing Grace” under the best of circumstances without crying, and for that reason have actually written into my will NOT to play that at my funeral. But I digress. Anyway, after the bagpipes play, parents are asked to leave campus within 30 minutes. Yes, that much emotion in that short a timespan would be tough.
• Don’t expect to have a slow, meaningful dinner after you help your child set up his or her dorm room. They’re going to want to meet new friends. It’s best to have that dinner before you arrive on campus.
• Don’t freak out when your kid calls you and makes it sound like the world is about to end. Chances are that within a few hours they’ll be fine. If not, then try to distinguish between a temporary setback and a bigger issue.
• Be on the same page as your child’s other parent. If Junior’s freaking out and wants to come home, and you want to make him stay, make sure the other parent isn’t on Expedia buying the plane ticket back home.
• Don’t let your child have a car at school freshman year. They don’t need it, and colleges generally discourage it anyway. If they do have a car, expect that they will become an airport shuttle service, or worse, a party shuttle service.
• Make sure you talk to your kid about all the difficult but important topics you can think of (i.e., sex, drugs, drinking). This is one of your last best chances to do so. Make sure they know to never accept an open soda can or drink punch.
• Warn them that one of the dangers of playing beer pong is that they can catch mono by sharing cups.
• Don’t expect a big college to inform you if your child is skipping class or having a problem.
• Give your child space so that they can learn to be independent. If you feel like you aren’t communicating enough, try texting. Also, you might want to set up a time each week that you can talk. On the other hand, some kids will call you all the time as they walk between classes.
• Make sure your child knows how to do laundry and balance finances before leaving for college.
• Be sure your child knows what to do if he has a bad roommate or gets sick.
• Most kids will switch majors at least once.
• Although it’s helpful to visit schools before your child applies, don’t sweat it if they don’t. Several parents said they were glad they didn’t waste money on expensive East Coast college trips because their child wound up falling in love with a school in California or Oregon.
• Support your child’s college choice. Wherever they choose, someone will criticize his or her choice. Make sure they know not to take that personally, and that you’re happy they found somewhere they’re excited about. And if they’re not excited at some point, that will probably pass as they make more friends.
• Each time your child returns for break, they’ll probably be different. (Hopefully in increased maturity!) Make sure you lay some expectations out regarding curfews, laundry, working, etc. so everyone’s on the same page. Watch out that you’re not too tough on them, or they may not want to return in the future.
• If you’re religious, keep your child in your prayers. They’ll need it.

I’m sure I’m missing something, since I wasn’t taking notes. Do you have any advice to add?

Apparently our school college counselor puts on a program like this, but with college kids on the panel and aimed at high school students and their parents. I’ll keep an eye out for that this fall!

Playground Surfaces: How far we’ve come. Or not.

Posted on 12. May, 2009 by kchristieh in education, my life, parenting, work

When my kids were in their early elementary school years, there was a rash of serious injuries caused by kids falling from their school’s play equipment onto the sand surface beneath. Committees convened, research was conducted, and parents implored the school and district administration to make the playground safer.

At one point, the school superintendent said she didn’t care what parents said. Ooooh – you.don’t.say.that.to.us!!

That’s when I joined the fight. I had more free time than ever, since eToys had just imploded, and my website design business was still in its infancy. I linked arms with other mothers and fathers as news crews filmed us on the playground, and eventually and installed a safer, poured rubber surface. Soon after that, the superintendent left, and a year later, I became the PTA president.

So I REALLY enjoyed making this website for Spectraturf. They have incredibly creative designs, and I enjoyed using their bright colors and rounded surfaces on the site. They’re still filling in content, but here’s what it looks like:

This is a BIG step up from the asphalt playground at my elementary school playground! Don’t believe me? It’s hard to believe, but it’s STILL asphalt! Here’s a recent image of Jefferson School in North Arlington, NJ from Google Maps:

At least they let the girls wear pants now. It was kind of tough to play with gusto in a dress.  :(

Read about an amazing everyday hero every day

Posted on 09. May, 2009 by kchristieh in inspirational people, parenting

“Hero” is a big word. It describes someone who’s made a great personal sacrifice to help or save another person.

Most of us don’t meet too many heroes in our lifetime. I’ve met a few, and have blogged about others.

Next time you’re feeling a bit negative about your fellow humans, check out Today’s Hero Blog. Each day it tells the story of an everyday hero. These aren’t people you’re likely to read about in the newspaper or on Wikipedia, but that makes them that much more extraordinary. Most of these people have quietly made a difference in others’ lives without any expectation of recognition. They do what they do because it’s the right thing to do.

Here are a few of my favorite stories. Watch out for the first one: it made me cry.

• Randy Shroeder, who quit the Army to raise three daughters after his wife died at a young age;
• Douglas Weymier, a high school teacher who went above and beyond to get a student on the right track;
• Ben Jones, a bus driver who went out of his way to help a passenger who was down on her luck.

We don’t all get a chance to be heroes. But if we ever get the chance, I hope we’ll all step up and become one. And hopefully I’m teaching that to my kids.

Once you learn this new math, you’ll never look at life the same way again

Posted on 07. May, 2009 by kchristieh in cool websites, my life, parenting, quotes

The title of yesterday’s post (Save the babies + educate the kids = healthy society) was inspired by New Math by Craig Damrauer. The site uses simple arithmetic and algebra to illuminate many life truths.

Here are a few of my favorite equations:

Haha! I used that one this morning with my daughter. Eventually I caved in since my husband wasn’t available for an emergency wardrobe consultation at the time.

If she’d asked him first, he may have used this equation. But he probably wouldn’t, since he’s very confident and decisive.

I thought the next two were witty:

This one reminds me of Gaby on “Desperate Housewives,” which I admit to listening to while I file and pay the bills.

The next one really speaks to me. I often say that circumstances aren’t as disappointing when expectation matches reality. It’s a good one for moms to keep in mind as Mother’s Day approaches.

And this one…it’s a message for me to go to bed now so I don’t get sick again.

Now it seems like everything that happens to me is either a potential Facebook status or an equation. Maybe that’s because Geek + Social Butterfly = Me. Oh no!!

My favorite online college search sites

Posted on 10. Apr, 2009 by kchristieh in cool websites, education, parenting

This week my family took tours of five colleges and drove through several more, all in the quest to find schools that would match our teenagers’ interests, talents and personalities.

Visiting the schools when classes were in session was invaluable. It was important for my kids to see what the students were like, and to see whether they could imagine themselves fitting in with them. My kids were also very concerned with school energy and spirit, so it was good for them to see which schools shined or failed in that department.

We did lots of research beforehand, also. We purchased several college guides, including one that included student reviews, and copied the relevant pages and brought them with us on our trip. I also looked up all the schools we considered visiting on our trip on the internet. I especially appreciated student review sites. I kept in mind that there will always be disgruntled people at any school, but I looked for trends in the comments.

We’ve only scratched the surface for visiting colleges, so I’ve started a College Resource page on this blog. You can either click here to visit it, or find it in the list of pages to the right. I’ll continue to update it as I find more useful college resource sites. It includes much of the same information that I’ve put on our high school PTSA website, www.lchs912.org.

Hope it helps!

STD rates among teens and young adults

Posted on 26. Mar, 2009 by kchristieh in education, parenting, startling statistics

Today my Parent Ed. class finished up a series about teens and sex. Besides the risk of pregnancy and adverse emotional issues, one of the big reasons parents want their kids to not have sex is so that they can avoid contracting a sexually transmitted disease (STD). Which made us wonder…what are the rates of STDs among teens? I’ve heard they’re high, as demonstrated by these oft-repeated statistics:

One in two sexually active youth will contract an STD by age 25.

Half of all new HIV infections occur among adolescents. (5)

According to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention, here are infection rates for the major STDs. Where I could find them, I included the rates for teens and young adults.

Of course, these statistics vary greatly by socioeconomic class, ethnicity, living situation and other factors.

I was surprised to see that there were so many more HPV and genital herpes cases. I also didn’t realize that the vaccine preventable-HPV strain was such a small fraction of all HPV cases. When you add these together, and consider that some people are counted in more than one disease category, it wouldn’t add up to 50%. However, the statistic at top was for sexually active people, so that makes sense.

Whether you think you or your child is at a high risk or a low risk, it’s better to be careful.

Sources:
(1)    http://www.cdc.gov/std/stats07/adol.htm
(2)    http://www.cdc.gov/hiv/topics/surveillance/basic.htm#hivaidsage
(3)    http://www.cdc.gov/STD/stats07/other.htm#HPV
(4)    http://www.wrongdiagnosis.com/g/genital_herpes/stats.htm
(5)    http://www.ashastd.org/pdfs/ASHA_05.final.pdf