I was brave, but she was braver

Posted on 16. Jul, 2010 by kchristieh in my life

Last night I not only attended The Moth StorySLAM for the first time, but I was brave enough to tell a story. I stood in front of a roomful of people, whom I couldn’t see because the lights were so bright, and told the story of my wild eToys ride. The theme of the evening was “On A Dime”, and ten people’s names were chosen out of a hat to tell a personal story of five minutes or less to the audience and a panel of judges. The judges liked my story, and I scored well.

There were several amazing stories that deservedly scored higher than mine. I am blessed that these are not my story. One man told of how he almost wound up in prison at Leavenworth, and a woman told of how her mother almost drove her and her siblings off a cliff.

But the most poignant story was the last story, which was told by a very classy, poised woman who is probably a few years older than me. She told of when she was 15 and had a crush on an older boy from another high school, and was thrilled that he was coming to a party at her friend’s house. When he finally arrived, he asked if she wanted to go upstairs to talk. He didn’t have talking in mind, however, and wound up raping her. As he zoomed away in his convertible, she reflected on how her life was forever changed, and how the people at the party had no idea. She was so honest, and admitted that her 15-year-old self thought this was the beginning of true love. Of course, it wasn’t. Fast forward six years, and she was in a bar with a female friend. She saw the guy across the bar, and went up to him and addressed him by name. (Note: throughout the story, she used his name. Of course, I won’t say it here, but I’ll never forget it.) When he responded that he did, SHE PUNCHED HIM. Then she ran away. Of course, that didn’t make it all better, but it helped a little. I hope that telling the story last night helped too. I wanted to give her a hug and tell her how brave she was for telling that story and how inspired I was by her actions, but I didn’t see her afterwards. Everyone in the room seemed so nice, so I’m sure she had support.

I can’t recommend The Moth StorySLAM highly enough. I love their NPR show, and speaking and hearing stories in person was even better. I laughed, I cried, and I thought about what I’d do in different situations. I felt like I walked in these peoples’ shoes, and that makes me a better, more empathetic person. Also, as I mentioned, everyone in the room seemed really nice, and I felt very comfortable there.

Too bad it’s not open to people under 21, since it was held in a bar. I wish I could have brought my 18-year-old daughter.

Don’t box me in with labels

Posted on 14. Jul, 2010 by kchristieh in my life

When a well-meaning friend recently referred to me as a “Mommy Blogger,” I instantly got defensive. Over the past 1,400+ blog posts, I’ve covered a wide variety of topics and made a conscious effort not to use my unsuspecting family as my primary blogging material. In fact, a quick survey of my most recent 20 posts shows that only 1 centered on something I did as a parent, and that one (“Why I Love Baccalaureate“) could have been written by anyone in attendance at that event. As blessed as I am to be a parent, I especially don’t want to be labeled as something that doesn’t totally define me, or that implies something I’m not.

Here are some other labels that people have pinned on me, and why I hope you can see beyond them:

MOM: I’m the proud parent of a 16-year-old and an 18-year-old. They’re great kids, and yes, they call me “Mom.” But I have my own life, with just as many friends on Facebook, and I don’t need to live vicariously through them, spy on them, or pander to them the way the “Mom” label might imply to some people. Ironically, or perhaps predictably, I think that the people that put the “Mom” label on me the most are my children’s peers.

WIFE: I’ve been married 23 years to a great guy. Wow. That’s twice as long as my parents were married to each other. I’m blessed to be in a marriage loaded with mutual love, respect, values, interests, etc. But as much as I may be the one that makes the dinner and drives the kids, I have my own life too. And so does my husband. Being a wife is wonderful, but it’s not all that I am.

DEMOCRAT: Over the past 19 years, I think I’ve only voted for one Republican. As much as I’d like to call myself an Independent, because I do think independently, I think my voting record definitely qualifies me as a Democrat. But I don’t agree with all the positions of the Democratic party, even some that are basic to other people. I think my positions are consistent and logical, but don’t we all?

WHITE: When I was an RA in college, one of the students in my dorm, whose father had been a sharecropper, called me the most “white bread” person she’d ever known. Yes, I am White. The parts of me that don’t see the light of day could blind you with their brightness, and I am shocked at how closely I align with the website “Stuff White People Like.” Yesterday I dragged the kids to Whole Foods to get more Mandarin Pumpkin Marmalade for my morning crêpe, and they said that was incredibly White of me. Given that for the over 400 years that I can trace back my family tree all my ancestors hail from Northern Europeans, this label sticks. But please don’t think that because I’m one race, it doesn’t mean that I don’t love people of all races. I married a Latino man, who has ancestors over the past 150 years that were Native American, Persian, Italian, and Spanish. I don’t care what race the person my children go out with or marry someday is; I care about what’s in that person’s heart, and in their character. And if you really want to get technical, I’m not exactly white. I’m more like the square on the right, which is hex #FFF3ED.

JERSEY GIRL: Yes, I was born in New Jersey. But I chose to leave. See the next label.

CALIFORNIAN: I LOVE California. I love the weather, the diversity of people and their cultures, and the geography. But most of all, I love the energy and enthusiasm of my adopted state, and the freedom and encouragement to venture forth and buck tradition to try new things. But I don’t have blinders on; I know California isn’t perfect. Our public education system is sinking fast at all levels, and we’re far from resolving important issues like immigration, prison overcrowding, and health care. We’ve also taken a big hit economically over the past few years. So while I’m proud and blessed to be a Californian, like my state, I’m complicated and not easily labeled. Ditto for being AMERICAN. I was so lucky to be born here, and am so proud to be a citizen of a country that values freedom so highly. But it doesn’t mean I agree with everything our nation does. Thankfully I have the freedom to be able to say that!

MIDDLE-AGED: I’m 47. Born in 1963, high school class of 1981, college class of 1985. I don’t hide it. Even so, I don’t feel any older than I did 20 years ago. Sure, only my hairdresser knows the true color of my lovely locks, and you won’t see me in a bikini anymore. But I feel like I have just as much energy and zest as I ever have. I embrace the information revolution, and have loved keeping up with all the new tools that allow me to stay efficient and productive in my life and in my career. My age actually benefits me in that I’ve experienced so much more of life that I feel smarter and wiser than ever. So call me middle-aged, but make sure it’s a compliment, not a hindrance. (Oh, how I hope this is all true in 20 years!)

CHRISTIAN: I am Christian. I believe that God sent Jesus to us because he loves us, and that we should follow his teachings and LOVE one another. And that’s the rub: I think that many Christians these days, who spend the bulk of their time bashing people they don’t agree with, shed a bad light on Christianity. I think God loves everyone, no matter what their race, gender, sexual orientation, etc. and that we should too. So I hope that when you label me as a Christian, you think love, not hate.

GEEK: Yes, I have an MS in engineering, and can easily stay up all night refining the code on a website to make sure that each pixel matches up. But “Geek” to some people implies a lack of social skills, and that’s definitely not a problem for me. (See the Facebook reference above.)

Maybe if you combine these labels you’ll get a better picture of who I am, as long as you bear in mind the ways I’ve stated I don’t adhere to their stereotypes. Once people know me, they know that instead of labels, they should use adjectives to describe me. I’d prefer hard-working, caring, flexible, social, eager, curious, and many others. Just be careful not to stereotype me. I’m a unique person, with lots to contribute, just like everyone else.

PS – Despite not wanting to be called a “Mommy Blogger,” I will probably write a few posts about my first child going off to college next month. I may not only be a Mom, but it is a big part of who I am, and we’re going through some big changes in our house.

My dog is jealous

Posted on 13. Jul, 2010 by kchristieh in animals

My dog may be jealous of this pooch we saw recently, but he’s too short to drive anyway. Besides, I’ll have my hands full teaching my son to drive for the next few months.

My new favorite cooking site

Posted on 09. Jul, 2010 by kchristieh in art, food

What happens when artists from all over the world showcase their skills to clearly present their favorite recipes? You get “They Draw & Cook: Recipe Renderings by Artists, Illustrators & Designers.” This fabulous blog features mouth-watering recipes depicted in a variety of different artistic styles, but all within a one-frame picture. The recipes range from cake to salmon rillettes to salsa verde, and hail from countries as diverse as Japan to Italy to Poland.

I love seeing how people can take the same assignment and come up with something completely different. I’d love to make all the recipes, but I think I’ll start out with the Tatziky,

the Tilapia,

and the Pan-Fried Fish with Lemon Caper Sauce.

If I had the time, I’d depict my mom’s amazing lasagna recipe. Maybe someday…

My Top 75+ iPod Touch Apps

Posted on 08. Jul, 2010 by kchristieh in technical

When we recently purchased a MacBook for our daughter to take to college, I asserted myself and claimed the iPod Touch that came with it. I’m so glad I did. While we wait for Verizon to start selling iPhones, I’ve become completely obsessed with and dependent upon the apps on my new iPod Touch.

I can click to my favorite apps – ShoppingList, Mail, Facebook, Contacts, Safari and Twitter – directly from my home screen. I highly recommend ShoppingList. I walk through the grocery store with my iPod in hand, checking off items on my categorized list. I also use it for packing for trips.

I’ve categorized the rest of my apps into 14 different categories. Here are my favorites for each category:

College:

• iStanford: Shows what’s going on at Stanford each day. I wish I could hear all the great speakers and attend the great events, but maybe it’ll come in handy the next time I visit.
• TommyCam: I can see a live view of the Tommy Trojan statue at USC. This Fall maybe my daughter will call me when she’s standing in front of the statue, waving to me. You can also see the TommyCam online here.
• CollegeMapp: Keeps track of college application submissions and statuses. I’ve got to get my son to put this on his iPod. Yes, I get to experience the college application process all over again this year.

Date / Time / Cal:

• CalenGoo: Great Google Calendar app. Our family’s calendars are on Google Calendar.
• Super Countdown: Counts the days until a big event. Right now, we’re counting the days until my daughter leaves for college (40).
• IP Free: For women. If you don’t get it, you shouldn’t.
• Clock: Shows me the time in various time zones.

Entertainment:

I don’t spend much time in this area, but this category includes YouTube, Fandango, Flixster, IQ+ Netflix, The Onion, Oprah Mobile, Videos, Kindle, This American Life and Public Radio.

Finance:

• Mint.com: I can view and categorize my financial transactions. It synchs with the online version.
• Tip Calculator: Easy way to figure a tip and split a bill.

Food:

Some cookbooks are completely downloaded on the iPod, and others will only show up offline if you “favorite” a recipe. Cookbooks include:

• How to Cook Everything (where I learned to make crepes!). This was worth paying for, as it downloaded the whole cookbook to my iPod and includes great step-by-step directions, tips and recipe variations. It also includes a timer for each step.
• Epicurious
• AllRecipes
• Recipes
• On the Grill (shout out to Jamie Purviance!)
• Whole Foods
• Jamie Oliver’s 20 Min Meals.

Music:

• Pandora: Just like Pandora.com. Listen to your favorite playlists.
• Vuvuzela: My virtual vuvuzela comes in handy when I watch World Cup games.
• Music: The music from my iTunes on my computer.
• Binaural Beat: Relaxing sounds.
• Shazam: Identifies songs. I haven’t used it yet, since it would require me to plug in my earbuds/microphone. I’m usually at my computer, so I can usually see what song is being played if I’m actually listening to music.

News:

If I’ll be offline, I’ll download the news before I leave home. It’s especially handy while waiting in a car line.

• New York Times
• Slate
• TheAtlantic and AtlanticWire: Look for new versions coming soon!
• The Daily Beast
• NPR News and NPR Addict
• WSJ (Wall St. Journal)
• LA News, KTLA 5, Fluent News
• Scanner911: Listen to real-time police scanners from around the U.S. We’re in the LA County Sheriff’s territory, but LAPD is much more interesting.

Photography:

• Flickr: Synchs with my photos at
• Rebel T2i (my camera’s manual)
• Photos: The photos I’ve chosen to upload from my computer.

Productivity:

• MobileRSS: Allows me to see all the items in my feed. I can download it when I’m online and read it when I’m offline.
• Things: Synchs with my Things to-do list on my computer
• Evernote: Synchs with Evernote on my computer and online.
• Dropbox: Allows me to read files that synch with my computer via Dropbox. Password-protected.
• iDisk: Part of MobileMe
• InstaPaper: Allows me to save articles to read later.
• GoodReader: Read pdfs

Reference:

• Articles: Great way to find something on Wikipedia.
• Dictionary, English/Francais Dictionary, Eng<>Spa Dictionary
• Google
• Wolfram
• YellowPages, W&Y Pages
• Wikipanion
• WebMD
• Bible, FastFacts

Shopping:

Apple Store, Amazon.com, Groupon, App Store, iTunes

Travel:

• TripAdvisor
• TrafficLA: Shows camera views of different freeways. I wish I could find an app that would show a map with how busy different freeways are.
• TripTracker
• Yelp
• GoogleEarth
• FreeMaui
• Maps
• Chateaux de Loire: I can dream, can’t I?

Utilities:

• Settings
• Free Wi-Fi
• Flashlight
• Calculator
• KitchenPro: Translates cups to TB, etc.
• Carpenter: Level, ruler, etc.
• Life: BMI, life expectancy
• Notes: I use Evernote instead.

Weather / Quakes:

• Weather: But it’s always the same here: sunny, sunny, sunny.   :)  (except yesterday and the day before)
• QuakeWatch: Shows and maps the most recent, biggest and closest quakes.
• TWC (The Weather Channel)
• pUniverse: Plots the stars and planets from wherever you wish.

As much as I love my iPod Touch, I’m frustrated that I can’t put more than 12 apps in a given category. If there’s a way to do that, please let me know.

In case you’re curious, I uploaded my own wallpaper as a photo into my Photos app.